And the award for World's Most Annoying Pistachio goes to . . .

THIS LITTLE FUCKER.

At first I thought I wouldn't eat him. I thought I'd let him sit and rot in a Fargo landfill until, as if by fate, a certain bird would probably choke on him and die, thus giving him at least some potential. But alas, I was hungry so I ate it.

I eat too much:

Breakfast

- Two bowls of cereal, each with whole milk.

Lunch

- Fries and a small Ron Johnson (chicken, ham, onions, mushrooms, pineapple, lettuce tomato, teriyaki, mayo, honey mustard) at Grand Junction

5 PM Snack

- Cup of Green Tea with Citrus, large bowl of this stuff (which happens to be THE most amazing frosted cereal in the world) along with whole milk, a peanut butter cookie, and a cup of pistachios.

I will still be having supper, which will probably end up being half a frozen pizza, a green apple, and water (and/or green tea), and I will also end up having popcorn while at the movie theatre tonight.

Holy fuck.

That made you hungry, didn't it? I know it did. It's making me hungry too.

- - -

Go ahead. Eat.